Thursday, October 27, 2011

A Tribute to Cindy-Face and Lielzebub

Let's go back to the Fall of 2005. I was nineteen, a semi-sophomore at BYU, one of the newest first altos in the BYU Concert Choir, and the roommate of two lovely ladies to whom I've dedicated this blog post.

I could go on about how Cindy has one of the least weird-looking babies I've ever seen (seriously--out of all the newborn pictures she posted, there was not one that looked like a terrifying lizard monster), or about how Liel has this vast cultural knowledge of all things French and fascinating, but instead, I'll post some "documents" that we drew up when we began living together, just to prove the collective awesomeness that was the three of us in 602 N 800 E #103*.


  • Cindy and Alexandra-Performance Psych until 6:50
  • Do Dinner on Own
  • FHE Night
  • Alexandra-Bio Lab until 6:50
  • Liel and Cindy make food that has leftovers
  • Gilmore Girls!!!!
  • Cindy and Alexandra-German Choir until 5:50
  • All cook something together (Easy stuff)
  • ALIAS!!!!
  • Rotate who cooks dinner each week
  • Will have dates maybe (in which case, eat something small before so date doesn’t think you’re a pig)
  • Entertain with fun parties that will show everyone how amazingly wonderful we are!
  • Will have dates maybe (see Friday)…then again, whom are we kidding? We’ll never have dates. We’re sad.
  • Eat Homemade Pizza together!
  • All cook something together
  • Bond

We actually kept the dinner schedule going pretty well. We stopped watching "Alias" because it got weird, but our Thursday night dinners were quite memorable. And we didn't really have dates that often, except for one time I turned down going to dinner with a boy I liked because we were making the homemade pizza (I got lectured because of that).

  1. Condo=Love. Love the Condo; Love your roommates; Love yourself.
  2. Don’t do drugs.
  3. All boys who will be spending excessive amounts of time here must be approved by other two roommates.
  4. No making out in the house. Do it outside, away from the window. Goodnight kisses are okay.
  5. No hair in the sinks or showers.
  6. Conserve electricity-be sure to turn off lights when not in the room.
  7. Last one up at night: turn off all lights, lock door.
  8. A good thorough cleaning job will be done at least once a month. Schedules and job divisions will be provided later.
  9. If you’re on a date with a boy you like and the two of you are at the door and there’s no kissing going on, the roommate(s) at home have every right to play “Kiss the Girl” out the window to get the point across.
  10. If you’re on a date with a boy you don’t like and he’s trying to kiss you, the roommate(s) at home have to save you by opening the door at an “inopportune” time.
  11. As is made clear by rules nine and ten, we will wait up for you if you’re on a date.
  12. Boyfriends will not interfere with our friendship.
  13. Put the toilet lid down!
  14. Don’t piss each other off. And if you do, apologize. Don’t throw things or shout obscenities. Unless it’s for comic effect.
  15. Obey all rules of common courtesy.
  16. Be flexible.
  17. Don’t pull a you know who with a you know what.
  18. Don’t burn the condo down. The condo=love. See rule one. Do you want our love to burn? Huh? Do you?
  19. Learn something new about everyone once a week.
  20. Don’t sin anymore ever. You reject from the war in heaven. Just kidding. Okay, the real twentieth rule is that we should pray together. The roommates that pray together, stay together. Until one of them gets married. Or graduates. Whichever comes first.

These were our rules. We talked about making out a lot (probably because we mostly didn't until Cindy got her boyfriend-who-is-now-her-husband in June).

Why We Should Have Boyfriends:
  1. We are dang cute!
  2. We’re funny! Hello, have you met us?
  3. We can sing…that’s hot.
  4. We’re smart. We got into BYU; that’s proof of that.
  5. We cook. Maybe not like [NAME HAS BEEN DELETED], but we can still cook.
  6. We won’t cheat on you.
  7. We have excellent and flexible tastes in movies.
  8. We will not make you do stupid things.
  9. We won’t call you strange names.
  10. Cindy is a good kisser. Alexandra learns quickly. Liel will not be conscious through it; she’ll be compliant.
  11. Cindy plays video games.
  12. Alexandra has amazing rhetoric.
  13. We speak various languages.
  14. We’re adventurous and willing to try new things.
  15. We keep the Honor Code religiously.
  16. We will take you to the temple; you want to go to the highest degree of the Celestial kingdom, right? Well, we’ll get you there.
  17. We shower regularly and brush our teeth lots.
  18. God owes us for years of sucky boys and breakups.
  19. People our age are getting married! We need to catch up.
  20. Boys make you warm. It’s cold outside. We need warm boys.
We made a list, because men respond to logical arguments better than any other form of seduction. I don't know how I was included in number 14.

*Not one of us lives here anymore, so don't bother starting your stalking there.

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Why I'm Currently Crabby

Another famous crabby lady
I've been crabby a lot lately. Here's why:
  • I'm the ward choir director, which is a calling that I really like, and frankly, the only calling at which I think I would be any good. However, I don't feel like the people who come to choir care about choir at all, and this makes it really difficult for me to be an effective leader.
  • I dislike when I'm having a cranky choir director moment and someone suggests we pray. I know that prayer is awesome and a good and proper thing to do, but sometimes I feel like it's a little condescending, like the person is suggesting that I'm cranky because I'm spiritually unworthy rather than because there's something legitimate that's frustrating me that can be fixed without prayer.
  • I'm still sick. My cough has evolved into a cold+cough, which isn't too bad unless I have to breathe. It's also been wiping out all of my energy. I haven't stayed up past nine-thirty at all this weekend, which has caused me to miss out on anything that might even resemble fun.
  • People have been lecturing me about things I've done or haven't done, assuming they understand the inner workings of my mind or the thought process behind why I have or haven't done these things.
  • I don't feel like I have a confidante, someone to whom I can explain my thought processes, someone who will understand and listen without lecturing or expecting me to reveal any more or less than I want (apart from everyone reading this blog, I guess).
  • I don't have a boyfriend. I know that's a stupid female reason to be cranky, and a reason that will probably earn me more lectures about the fact that I'm not "open and engaging" and won't make the necessary advances in life, but it's a contributing factor to my mood nonetheless.
  • I'm suffering from another common cause of female crankiness right now. Enough said.
  • I just upgraded to Internet Explorer 9 and it's annoying. I don't like the way it handles tabs and the fonts seem too serif-y. And my internet is funky on Sundays.

Maybe on another day I'll write a list of reasons why I'm not crabby, but don't hold your breath. Now I'm going to go eat some chocolate.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

"Jolly Jeepers, Pick Up Sticks! Alex Just Turned Twenty-Six!"

I'm not sure at what age it becomes taboo for a woman to openly proclaim her age, but I turned 26 yesterday. I was talking with a friend at church who turned 26 a few months ago, and he exclaimed in a whisper, "isn't it awful? It's all downhill now!" First of all, dude, you're a man. It's not like you have a clock that's ticking away to the day when all of your eggs shrivel up and die. And secondly, 26 isn't old. It seems that we're in the age where "40 is the new 30," and as always, people in their twenties can still play teenagers on TV. At any rate, I feel that I'm settling into 26 nicely.

Here's a summation of my birthday festivities and such:

On the Sunday evening before my birthday, I had a few friends over for "cake and reverent mingling." The cake (which I made myself) was decent, although the frosting didn't turn out the way I envisioned it. It was more gooey than fluffy, but it was still delicious. "Reverent mingling" turned into a game where I let my guests ask any probing question they wanted to ask and I promised to answer truthfully. Questions ranged from "What is your dream vacation?" (Greece, basically everything that happened in "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants"), to "Do you remember your first kiss?" (No), to "Which guy* would you want holding your hand forever?" (Neil Patrick Harris).

My birthday was on a Monday, and Monday night I went to Max and Dylan's in Charlestown with Laura and Ashley. I ordered the Spinach and Artichoke Macaroni and Cheese and it was yummy. Then we went to Emack and Bolio's for ice cream, where I had something with "Funk" in the title that had chocolate and pretzels and caramel in it. Then we went to FHE where there was a lesson, prayer, activity, and a rainbow cake with purple icing (and nobody else thought that was funny).

As for my "25 things to do before I'm done being 25" list, I was able to knock off a few more things. I hugged all of my people, I stayed up past midnight, I watched "Hocus Pocus," bought some "fun" cereal, and ate cake. I'm still coughing up a storm of lungs, though, so there are still some things to work on.

Presents! My mom sent me dollars, which I'll frivolously spend on my electric bill or groceries or something; Laura got me an ice tray that makes ice cubes in the shape of skulls and crossbones! Sarah gave me chocolate which I'm going to try to not consume all at once (but they're Reese's it'll be tough); from Kelly I got a scarf and a "hens and chicks" plant (which she says is very difficult to kill); and Doree gave me flowers in pretty fall colors.

All in all, it was a pretty great birthday.

*Whoever wrote this question has some odd handwriting, and so originally I read the question as "Which gay would you want holding your hand forever?" Answer: Neil Patrick Harris.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

"[Do] Go Chasing Waterfalls"

Two nights ago, I had a dream. It was a pretty exciting dream--

A bunch of us were at this ward wilderness activity. There was a creek which was slightly up the hill from a larger river, and in between the creek and the river, there was a little path where couples would walk to go do couple things (i.e. to make out). I'm not in a couple, and neither is my roommate Lindsay, so I was like, "hey Lindsay, let's go walk on this trail and see what the fuss is about" (because apparently it was pretty). As we're walking along the trail, the creek up the hill starts to overflow and spill onto the path, and it washes us into the river! The river has a pretty strong current, and I remembered from somewhere that one isn't supposed to swim against the current (I checked later, apparently this is a real thing!) so I start swimming perpendicularly to the current, but Lindsay and I are still getting washed down. Chris is in the river, too, but I'm not as worried about her because I know she's a good swimmer (when I told Lindsay this part, she was offended, because she's a good swimmer, too). There's a waterfall ahead of us, so I grab onto some reeds and tree branches on the side of the river. Lindsay starts to float by, so I grab her and get her to the reeds. I'm a hero--

Or so I thought.

I explained this dream to Chris, and the little psychoanalyst replied:

"What?!? How could you? Don't you know that rivers are symbols for relationships? Not only did you not let yourself go over the waterfall, but you kept Lindsay from it as well!"

I apologized to Lindsay for subconsciously stunting her future romantic bliss; I really just thought I was doing a good thing (hey, sometimes a cigar--er, I mean waterfall--is just a waterfall). My dream also involved a guy from my ward taking me on a walk to go see this sea lion that was living in someone's basement, but I don't think that means anything.

Updates on "My 25 Things" - Part Deux

It's been a pretty productive week, folks! Here's what I've gotten done since last I updated you:

#4: Seven down, six to go. As an added challenge, I've promised my roommates (who refuse to hug me, by the way) that I would initiate the last six spontaneously, and that at least four of the six would be men.
#5: I went running on Tuesday and swimming yesterday. Even though I'm still coughing, my lungs didn't completely rebel against me for the exercise. And swimming at 4:30 in the afternoon at the Charlestown Community Center pool is fantastic. I was the only person there (aside from the lifeguard) so I could swim at my own pace and not have to worry about looking foolish. It did, however, remind me of that episode of "Are You Afraid of the Dark?" where there's the creepy swimming pool with the ghost in it.
#7: The book arrived in the mail this weekend, and I've begun it, but it's longer than I thought it would be, so I don't think I'm going to have it finished by Monday.
#9: I went to the mall with the sole purpose of finding these sweaters. Sadly, the mall was having a shortage of cute sweaters. For some reason, the style is all boxy and short these days. Even Old Navy, a store upon which I can always depend for a cute cardigan, left me wanting.
#12: Haircut, check. It's a little more bangsy than I intended, but I think it works, and the woman did a really great job at making it low-maintenance.
#16: Working on it. The cough is less, in that it doesn't wake me up. I just hope that it doesn't turn into a cold.
#17: Apparently my night of eternal coughing didn't count. Still working on this one.
#20: I tried to buy fishnet stockings at the mall, but they were not on sale.
#21: My nails are finally long enough that they'll look good and not like Spike from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer," so I'll try to do this tonight while I'm watching TV or something.
#22: I'm almost at the end of Mosiah, so it's looking good!
#24: I haven't run out of Special K with Fruit and Yogurt yet (you know, I didn't really look at the fiber content on this one, so I think I'm going to count it).
#25: I'm probably going to make my own cake. That seems depressing, but I have this amazing idea for a whipped cream/cream cheese icing with crushed Oreo cookies in it that I want to try out.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011


I realize that a lot of my posts are lists of things. I have a friend who has a separate blog just for lists, but I think if I had to manage two blogs, it wouldn't go well. That said, here for your enjoyment (or, more realistically, for your information), is another list.

Musical Theatre Duets I've Performed Formally:
  • "All I Ask of You" from Phantom of the Opera (as Christine)
  • "I Still Believe" from Miss Saigon (as Ellen)
  • "In His Eyes" from Jekyll and Hyde (as Emma)
  • "Salzburg" from Bells are Ringing (as Sue)
  • "The Grass Is Always Greener" from Woman of the Year (as Tess)
  • "Written in the Stars" from Aida (as Aida)
  • "Ah, Leave Me Not to Pine Alone!" from Pirates of Penzance (as Mabel--and I know this is technically not "musical theatre" proper, but it kind of counts).
  • "The Song That Goes Like This" from Spamalot (as the Lady of the Lake)
  • "The Doctor is In" from You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown (as Lucy)

Musical Theatre Duets I've Sung for Fun but Haven't Performed (Yet):

  • "For Good" from Wicked (as Elphaba)
  • "As Long as You're Mine" from Wicked (as Elphaba)
  • "I'd Give It All for You" from Songs for a New World (as Woman 1)
  • "In Whatever Time We Have" from Children of Eden (as Yonah)
  • "A Little Fall of Rain" from Les Miserables (as Eponine)

Musical Theatre Duets I Want to Sing Before I'm Dead:

  • "I Know Him So Well" from Chess (as Florence)
  • "Crazier Than You" from The Addams Family (as Wednesday Addams)
  • "Legally Blonde" from Legally Blonde (as Elle)
  • "Take It Like a Man" from Legally Blonde (as Elle)
  • "Mix Tape" from Avenue Q (as Kate Monster)
  • "Take Me or Leave Me" from Rent (as Maureen)
  • "Please" from Miss Saigon (as Kim)
  • "A Little Priest" from Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (as Mrs. Lovett)
  • "Say it Somehow" from The Light in the Piazza (as Clara)
  • "I Love You Because" from I Love You Because (as Marcy)
  • "Somewhere" from West Side Story (as Maria)
  • "The Piano Lesson" from The Music Man (as Marian)
  • "Elaborate Lives" from Aida (as Aida)
  • "Zuhaelterballade" from Threepenny Opera (as Jenny)

Musical Theatre Duets I Want to Sing but Can't Because I'm the Wrong Gender:

  • "What You Own" from Rent (as either Mark or Roger)

Well, according to this list, I've got my work cut out for me. I'd best be getting over this cough and finding myself some partners!

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Updates on "My 25 Things"

I know it's only been two days, but I'm sitting at my desk and I'm bored! Here are some updates on how I've been faring with my list of things to do before my 26th birthday:

#1: Check.
#8: Check (sort-of). I've got a lot of ward music stuff going on, but I think It'll all come together nicely
#13: Holy bananas, that cat loved me! More specifically, he loved my bedroom, my bed, my desk, my oscillating fan, and my hair scrunchie (which he ate), but as long as I didn't make any sudden movements, he seemed to quite enjoy hanging out with me.
#17: Technically yes, but does it count that the reason I was awake until midnight was that I couldn't fall asleep because every time I tried to take a full breath I burst into a fit of coughing? (I guess it goes without saying that #16 is still a work in progress.)

I'd say four out of twenty-five things in two days is pretty good, right?

Here are some more musings from the office, just to fill up more blog space:

  • There's an orchid at the reception desk. I haven't killed it by looking at it yet, so that's a miracle.

  • I made my first errand involving petty cash today. I bought milk because we were out, but while I was out buying milk, someone else brought in milk, so now there's a lot of milk.

  • We were out of animal crackers and Goldfish crackers for a while there. We have them now, thank goodness. I was worried there was going to be a riot.

Also...welcome to autumn! The past few days it has been officially cold outside, which means fall coat season is upon us. I wish I had a picture of my super cute fall coat, but just know that it's super cute. It's red and has ruffles. I feel very Cosmopolitan when I wear it.

That's all for today. Until I accomplish more things!

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

25 Things to Do While I'm Still 25

If I said it just occurred to me that I'm going to be 26 in two weeks, I'd be lying. I've been counting down the days to birthday time for quite a while now. I'm not sure why being 26 is a big deal. Maybe it's because I can now be categorized as someone in their "mid-to-late twenties." In forensic anthropology terms, I have entered Phase IV*. As my days of being 25 come to a close, it was suggested that I put together a list of "25 Things to Do While I'm Still 25." Here goes:
  1. Make a list of "25 Things to Do While I'm Still 25." Hey, I've only got 13 days, I have to keep things simple!
  2. Make a tarte tatin. I've done this before, but they're delicious, and I think it would be a great way to get rid of the apples I have in my kitchen.
  3. Introduce people to "Cry Baby." As previously mentioned, this is some of Johnny Depp's best work. It's like "Grease," only more ridiculous.
  4. Hug at least thirteen people. As a rule, I don't hug, but I make an exception for birthdays. I imagine most of this hugging will be done during my pre-birthday celebration.
  5. Go swimming at least once and go running at least twice. Ever since I started working every day, my exercise regime has gone downhill. Must kick off the fall-winter gluttony season with some cardio.
  6. Speak a complete sentence of words to the cute red-headed guy who works in my building and rides the bus with me sometimes.
  7. Read the book about the Luetgert Murder of 1897 (provided Amazon delivers it to me on time). I plan to become an expert in the "Formative Period" of forensic anthropology, and learning about all of the grisly cases seen by Dwight, Dorsey, et al. is an integral part of that process.
  8. Freak out less about the mass of responsibility my church calling is throwing at me this month.
  9. Buy two new cute sweaters, preferably ones with argyle or buttons and that are colors that aren't black.
  10. Attempt to have a conversation with that guy at church against whom I was initially prejudiced because I think his Peter Pan ca. 1991 haircut is ridiculous.
  11. Book a plane ticket home for Christmastime. (Hey, these can't all be life-changing goals, I do have a "to-do" list, you know.)
  12. Get a haircut that costs more than $15. I think I'm too old for the Hair Cuttery.
  13. Convince the cat that is temporarily living in my apartment that he loves me. I don't know why he growls and hides under the coffee table every time he sees me, but we will be best friends by the end of his stay (especially if he kills the mouse that is also squatting in our kitchen).
  14. Do a new restaurant review, but not necessarily about a new restaurant.
  15. Kiss a boy (or get kissed by a boy). This is low-priority/low-expectation, and I'm sure if it doesn't happen, I won't [remain a beast forever/turn into a pumpkin/fall asleep for 100 years], but it's on the list, even just to be neck-in-neck with Drew Barrymore (but then again, she got a young Michael Vartan, so no matter what, she's still ahead).
  16. Get better. I'm currently ill, with the awful, persistent cough and the achy everything and the generally being quite tired. I feel like this has to happen if I'm going to accomplish #15.
  17. Stay up until midnight one night. You may look at this and be like, "Seriously? What are you, some kind of geriatric loser?" To you, I say, "yes." I've been averaging a 10:30 pm bedtime since the fourth grade. To stay up until midnight is a feat, and since this is the end of my "younger years," it'll probably be easier now than later.
  18. Eat food at one of the awesome Townie haunts--probably either Jenny's Pizza and Subs or Grasshopper Cafe.
  19. Do something "death defying," like office-chair drag racing, or riding on a Vespa.
  20. Wear fishnet stockings to church. Actually, I don't know if I'm going to have time to do this before I'm 26. Maybe I'll just wear them to work where I sit behind a desk all day and nobody can see my legs.
  21. Paint my fingernails black.
  22. Get as far as the Book of Alma in my current round of Book of Mormon reading (I'm toward the end of 1 Nephi now, so that's feasible, right?).
  23. Watch "Hocus Pocus" with or without other people. Or maybe I'll save this one for closer to Halloween. They say "hell" in it, so it's not a kids' movie!
  24. Buy a breakfast cereal without taking its fiber content into consideration.
  25. Eat some hideously decadent dessert: one that may or may not have twenty-six candles attached to it.
This is a pretty lame list, but there's really nothing exciting about turning 26. 25 is sort of a big deal, 30 is a big deal, but all the ones in the middle are kind of "whatever." At any rate, stay tuned in two weeks for a follow-up report on which items I did and did not check off my list (though feel free to make predictions in the comments!).

*This is on the Suchey-Brooks (Brooks and Suchey, 1990) six-phase system for age-at-death estimation from the Pubic Symphysis. I'm probably still only Phase II (I haven't had any abdominal/pelvic CT scans to verify this), but those 95% confidence intervals don't lie.